When I started to read erotic ménage, I remember how lost I was with some of the acronyms that authors and publishers used. Most of the time, I thought 1/ it was another language from another planet and 2/ they did not want to include me and welcome me on their planet. With time and since I am the opposite of a shy person (no kiddin’), I asked, then I guessed. So I know some of you are still frustrated to figure it out.

On top of having my own blog here, I discovered a while a go goodreads. This is the fantastic place to be updated not only with new releases but also to see what the other readers think about a book you may consider reading. A lot are in their to-read list but what I like is that the number of people rating give an honest opinion.

What I find very fun is that I can easily find the menage category, the menage authors and the old and new releases on top of a general review. Some groups also are very interesting to belong to and many exist which you can pick as per your tastes.

One of a group I like very much is Menage Readers. And there you can find tons of goodies to read. BookieNookie, one of the mod, listed the following.

I asked her the authorization to copy and paste it on my blog and I give her full credit on it. I encourage you to visit her blog, to follow her on twitter and to sign in on goodreads and ask to join her group.

Twitter: BookieNookie ~ BookieNookie’s blog


Who is sleeping with whom?

M/F – male and female couple
M/M – male and male couple
F/F – female and female couple
M/F/M – menage where both men have sex with the female but not each other
F/M/F – menage where both women have sex with the male but not each other
M/M/F – menage where everyone has sex
F/F/M – menage where everyone has sex
F/M/M – menage where everyone has sex
M/F/F – menage where everyone has sex
F/M/M/M – men have sex w/ female-she probably doesn’t end up w/ one of them
M/F/M/M – men have sex w/ female-she DOES end up w/ one or more of them
M/M/F/M – men to the left of the (f) have sex w/ each other and the female. man to the right only has sex w/ the female. she probably ends up w/ 1 or 2 of the men
M/M/M/F – the three men have sex w/ each other and the female.

note: if it says MM sex or FF sex, it usually means one sex scene but it is not necessary with the heroes or the ending is not necessary a menage. It could be a sexy addition from the author to spice his story or a warning to tell the readers what kind of sex they will find in the story. It can also means that the heroes may have one on one sex interaction on top of a threesome.

BDSM – What goes on in the dungeon?

BDSM – This can be deciphered a few different ways:
B/D = Bondage & Discipline
S/M = Sadism & Masochism
D/s = Dominance & Submission
S/M = Slave & Master
BDSM elements: the relationship is more a top/bottom in the bedroom and reader may find sex toys, soft spanking.

The term “BDSM” is used in a general sense to describe any situation or practice which includes erotic power exchange, dominance and submission, pain play, bondage, sensation play, or anything related to these.

Roles in BDSM: Who does what?

Top/Dominant – is partner who is given control
Bottom/Submissive – partner who gives up control
Switch – switches between roles of the dominant and submissive

More information about the BDSM culture:

Extended Glossary of BDSM Terms
Wikipedia Glossary of BDSM Terms

Sexual Abbreviations and Words

ABF – Adult Breastfeeding
Age-Play – A form of role play in which a participant assumes the role of someone of a different age. Typically, the submissive partner will assume the role of a very young (and hence powerless) child.
Animal-Play – The sub acts or dresses like an animal (puppy, pony, cow, etc.)
ANR – Adult Nursing Relationship (also adult breastfeeding)
Apadravya – This male piercing is typically placed running vertically from the top of the Glans Penis and exiting at the bottom just behind it. This piercing is used to increase sexual pleasure for both the wearer and his partner. **NSFW** Apadravya Photo
Anilingus – Any sexual activity involving licking, kissing, or tonguing another person’s anus.
Brothercest – Menage where brothers have sex with each other as well as the third party
Bukake – to ejaculate on a woman’s face (mentioned in the description of Vow of Silence)
CD – Cross dressing – The act of one dressing up as the gender that they do not normally find themselves living as. This is done usually as a hobby, in order to live out fantasies, for drag shows/parties, or for sexual excitement. Not necessarily gay.
CFNM – Clothed Female Nude Male – this is exactly what it sounds like.
CBT – Cock and Ball Torture
Cock Stuffing – involves using thin, cylindrical items (thermometers, wire, rubber worms, etc.), & inserting them into the dick hole. Over many months, continue to gradually ream out the hole-at-the-head with larger items, thus ultimately allowing your “buddy” to obtain the goal of fucking your urethra.
Dubious Consent or dub con – Similar to non-con, but where the “victim” is given an ultimatum: Have sex with me or Die. So victim must consent to sex to stay alive.
DP – Double Penetration – penis or phallus in both vagina & anus
Forced seduction – when a heroine who loses virginity by force, a heroine who initially dislikes and actively resists the hero’s seduction, only ultimately to be overcome by desire.
LGBTQ – refers to “lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender” people. the “Q” was later added for those who identify as queer and are questioning their sexual identity.
Non-con – non consensual sex
Pegging is when a woman penetrates a man with a strap-on dildo.
Prince Albert – Male piercing done through the Urethra & exiting slightly behind the Glans Penis on the underside of the penis. Special ‘PA’ jewelry or a Curved Barbell can also be used. This piercing is used to increase sexual pleasure for both the wearer & his partner. **NSFW** Prince Albert Photo
Rimming – Licking the anus
St. Andrews Cross – Bondage achieved by spreading the appendages and fastening them with chains
Scat – Poop
Squirting (or gushing or female ejaculation) – refers to the expulsion of noticeable amounts of clear fluid by human females from the paraurethral ducts through and around the urethra during or before an orgasm. The exact source and nature of the fluid continues to be a topic of debate among medical professionals and is related to doubts over the existence of the G-Spot. (Wikipedia)
Taint – On a man – area between sack & crack AND On a woman – area between giney & heinie
TPE – Total Power Exchange relationship where the dominant or owner has complete authority and influence over the submissive’s life, making the majority of decisions…the dominant partner gets complete power at all times.
TS – Transgender – This is a broad term that includes transexual (pre/non or post-op), non-gender, bi (tri & multi) gender, androgynes, etc.
Twincest – Menage where twins have sex with each other as well as the third party.
Twink is a gay slang term describing a young or young-looking gay man (ages 18–23 ) with a slender build, little or no body hair, and no facial hair – generally used to describe an effeminate male.
W/S – Water Sports aka golden showers or being urinated on More on W/S or Watersports

General Conversation

ARC – Advanced Reading Copy
BOB – Battery Operated Boyfriend
BTW – By The Way
DD = Dear Daughter
DH = Dear Husband
DNF – Did Not Finish
DS = Dear Son
FIL = Father in Law
GFY – Gay For You
GLBT – Gay, Lesbian, Bi, Transexual
FWIW = For What It’s Worth
HEA – Happily Ever After
HFN – Happy For Now
IMO – In My Opinion
IMHO – In My Humble Opinion or In My Honest Opinion
IRL – In Real Life
LGBTQ – Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender/sexual, Queer/Questioning their sexual identity
LMAO – Laughing My Ass Off
LMFAO – Laughing My Fucking Ass Off
MIL = Mother in Law
NSFW – Not Safe For Work
NWS – Not Work Safe
OFY – Out For You
PM – Personal or Private Message sent to person’s inbox
PNR – Paranormal Romance
PWP – Porn Without Plot (and no that is not a typo…it is PWP)
ROFLMAO – Rolling on the Floor Laughing My Ass Off
SMH – Shakes My Head
TTYL – Talk To You Later
UF – Urban Fantasy
UFR – Urban Fantasy Romance
UST – Unresolved Sexual Tension

11 responses »

  1. K says:

    I would like to add to this. I have found acronyms like F/F/M or M/M/F also can hold to the same format as M/F/M or F/M/F. Basically, in the 3 person combos, it can also mean the 2 on the right and left only have sex with the one in the middle, regardless of sex. So those combos like F/F/M don’t necessarily mean everyone has sex with everyone else. It can mean there is a center to the triad, in that example, a woman, with whom the other woman and the man exclusively have sex.


    • great point but there is a consensus within the authors and publishers that MFM (or FMF) means that the 2 same genre are straight and when we see MMF or FFM, the two same genre are gay/lesbian/bi.

      That is the way people recognize the genres.

      We are also quite lucky because some publishers use MULTIPLE PARTNERS and we have no idea but reading the blurb to know and even that sometimes is not explicite to know.



  2. Noa Xireau says:

    Damn! I should have known this earlier. Now I need to check if I used m/m/m/f, but I think I put it the other way around. It’s the firs time I feel lucky that the editing process isn’t finished yet. Thanks for this post, it’s really very useful for erotica authors who are just beginning.

    Liked by 1 person

    • You are very welcome Noa.
      It is indeed confusing if occasional readers read the tags thinking they will read straight men and they get bisexual… although if you read my blog good versus outstanding you will see that for me there is no such 100% straight men in a menage.
      Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment ! 🙂


  3. Tina Mollere says:

    Ok I’ve seen this in a few books but have no ideal what it means can someone tell me…

    M+/F I’ve tried to Google it but I get a lot of crazy stuff to pop up…Don’t know if I’m asking the wrong question or what…lol

    Liked by 1 person

    • It looks like the person does not know menage acronyms but, for me, it looks like multiple men (M+) and one woman (F). However there is no indication if those men are bisexual or not and/or if the woman is part of the relationship.

      This is not the right acronym to use if this author wishes some exposure as nobody will understand it in my opinion

      hope this helps 🙂


      • Tina Mollere says:

        Yeah that was my feeling too…It was a bisexual book with 4 men and one woman. I believe she was trying to describe one of the sexual scenes where the woman took on 3 and one of males was sexual with one of the other guys…but that’s just a guess…lmao


        • Gay authors generally do not know acronyms except MMM and MM. But if it is 4 guys and if there is a MF encounter not part of the HEA, then it gets complicated. LOL

          Here the right one would have been MMMM MF MM

          MMMM for the HEA permanent relationship HEA
          MF for the sex encounter
          MM for the sex encouter

          and probably MMM if the author wanted a sex with 3 guys only.

          It is always better to add more tags. for 1. it will attract more readers and for 2. it is easier to understand the kind of relationship and the HEA

          I would guess that the cover was only guys? if a woman was on the cover then it is generally a sigh that she is part of the HEA menage ending 🙂


  4. Thomas E Hemp says:

    What does FMDS mean?


  5. Nicholas says:

    What does nsa mean?


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